Why Make Performance

It seems like everyone is talking about Gob Squad, so why not take it as an excuse to indulge in their YouTube channel?

Why do I make performance?

It has something to do with standing in a circle of rocks with my eyes closed, Cheetos in my hand, and deciding to make performances.  Something to do with Judith Howard's Dance Improv and Dance History classes and Jerome Bel. It has almost nothing to do with Swan Lake, except when it does (like last night, when I tried to learn the Pas d'Quatre in my living room).

I make performance because I don't know why I make performance.  I want a show/thing/event that fills out the spaces between people. I want to love that show/thing/event. I love and hate that performance evaporates when it's done.

Somewhere in me is a reserve that knows its own measure.  I don't know what that means, but it developed while I was busy reconciling the fact that I want to do weird things with the fact that I don't feel comfortable doing them in front of people. 

Phew. I have gotten nowhere. Maybe it's just that stage lights make me giddy.